If restaurants functioned like Microsoft
Patron: Waiter!
Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Waiter. What seems
to be the problem?
Patron: There's a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
Patron: No, it's still there.
Waiter: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a
fork instead.
Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.
Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl
are you using?
Patron: A SOUP bowl!
Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how
was the bowl set up?
Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the
fly in my soup?!
Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in
your soup?
Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!
Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?
Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day??
Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.
Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.
Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup, and the check. I'm running late
now.
Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check.
Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.
Patron: This is potato soup.
Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.
Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.
Waiter leaves.
Patron: Waiter! There's a gnat in my soup!
The check:
Soup of the Day ................................... $5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day .................. $2.50
Access to support ................................. $1.00
