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How does a blonde like her eggs in the morning

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How does a blonde like her eggs in the morning?

Fertilized.

How does a blond turn on the light after sex

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How does a blond turn on the light after sex?

She opens the car door.

Eyes closed

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Why did the blonde stand in front of a mirror with his eyes closed?

He wanted to see what he looked like asleep.

Even More Blonde Q and A

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Q: WHAT DID THE BLONDE SAY ABOUT BLONDE JOKES?
A: She said they were pretty good, but they might offend some Puerto Ricans.

Q: WHAT DID THE BLONDE THINK OF THE NEW COMPUTER?
A: She didn't like it because she couldn't get MTV.

Q: What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common?
A: You keep hearing about them, but never see any.

Q: How do you make a blond laugh on Monday mornings?
A: Tell them a joke on Friday night!

Read more...

Empire State Building

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A bleached blonde and a natural blonde were on top of the Empire State Building.

How do you tell them apart?

The bleached blonde would never throw bread to the helicopters.

Emergency Kit

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Josh was helping Sally, the blonde, clean out the trunk of her car. Inside, he noticed a bag labeled "Emergency Repair Kit". Looking at it a little closer, he noticed a stick of dynamite inside.

Thinking that was a bit strange, he asked Sally what it was for.

She said, "It's part of my emergency repair kit."

Josh said, "I can see that, but why?"

Sally replied, "In case I have a flat and need to blow up one of my tires."

Filing System

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Two secretaries were talking about their work. "I hate filing," said one. "No matter how careful I am, I can never find the papers I'm looking for. I forget where I have filed them."

"I used to have that problem too, but no more," her blonde friend said. "Now I make 26 copies of everything I type and file one under each letter of the alphabet. That way, I can't miss it!"
 

Dumb Blonde Crooks

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Two blonde robbers were robbing a hotel. The first one said, "I hear sirens. Jump!"

The second one said, "But we're on the 13th floor!"

The first one screamed back, "This is no time to be superstitious."

Drivers Licence

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A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

Donations

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead went to a church to donate money. The brunette draws a circle around her and throws up all her money.

She says that whatever lands inside the circle is for God, and whatever lands outside of the circle she keeps.

The redhead then draws a line, stands on it, and throws up all of her money. She said that whatever lands on the right side of the line is for God, and whatever lands on the left side she keeps.

The blonde throws up her money, and yells,"God, whatever you catch is yours, and whatever you don't I get to keep."